6. “It isn't our type of humor.”
5. “…fixated on the ridiculous”
3. “Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately I can't use it. My submission guidelines clearly state that we prefer nor (sic) profanity, and yours is laced with it.”
2. “I didn't like that the weirdness came from mental afflictions.”
...and my all-time favorite:
1. “Pulling things from people’s asses is not our forte. We’ll pass.”
How could you NOT want to read these stories? That said I had one rejection of Puppet Shows as a whole that said , “…your humor is spot-on and (the) narrative is energetic and engaging.”
So you see, rejections are not always bad. That's what I want to bring to you. Some are hilarious; others are downright flattering enough to piss you off.
Something I came upon recently was the lyrics to a song I wrote some 15 years ago called "Puppet Show." The song itself was very Pete Townshend-inspired and was never recorded. However, I have here the lyrics of said song, the theme song, if you will (Won't you?) to the collection of hilarious short stories to will soon be Puppet Shows:
Puppet Shows Don't try to shut me up You know I'm always shot down Don't try to look me up 'Cause I won't be around You wish me goodnight Just to hang around all day You love that crazy feeling Til that feeling goes away Puppet shows Tell me once again Puppet shows We're coming to the end Puppet shows The players dance and sing Puppet shows Cut off my strings I keep walking forward My feet keep walking back It's there in black and white Well, all I see is black You love my performance Well, I dig your show Ask me all your questions I'll tell you all I know Look me in the eye Try the other one too You gotta do what you can But what can you do The curtain comes down So begins the play You can say what you want But what can you say?